I've had an okay week. I've been focused more on staying within my points, but it hasn't been particularly easy. For some reason, I am still having trouble with overeating - it seems almost compulsive at times. Based on my history with eating disorders and some of the other troubling signs (hiding food, eating in secrecy, etc.), I've made a decision to seek some therapy. I'm worried that whatever issues caused me to turn to anorexic and bulemic behavior in the past are still unresolved, and have been rearing their head in the form of binge eating and compulsive overeating. Maybe I'm just looking for an excuse, but it can't hurt to talk it out.
We've started an exercise plan, as well. My husband wants to lose some weight as well, so we've been getting up earlier in the morning, heading down to the basement and doing some moderate exercise every morning. It definitely helps set the tone for the day! I find myself less likely to eat destructively if I've done a little sweating in the morning. Something about knowing I almost died to burn off 200 calories makes me more reluctant to consume that same amount and then some in a single sitting.
I also signed myself up for a 10-week "body makeover" class. In mid March I start a program called Kosama - it's intense, one hour a day exercise consisting of kickboxing, plyometrics, yoga, etc. I'm looking forward to it - it includes some education and assistance with nutrition as well, plus I got a kick-ass deal on the enrollment fees. The best part is you have a chance to win some serious cash if you're selected as, for lack of a better term, the "biggest loser". I think it involves posting your before and after pictures on a website and allowing others to vote, which is humiliating...but motivating!
Tonight's dinner is baked organic chicken with organic mashed potatoes and steamed broccoli. Nice and healthy! Hopefully it will make up for lunch...we went to a restaurant that makes its own homemade potato chips. I put away half a basket of those suckers - you truly cannot eat just one. It's all or nothing. Go big or go home. I chose to go big. Which is what my ass is doing right now.
I think therapy sounds like a good plan. A lot of times, the counselors can ask you questions you didn't think of, or better, questions you are afraid to ask. As for the binge eating, you might want to read the Escape from Obesity blog. She is dealing with binge eating and how to learn not to binge. I find myself identifying with a lot of the thoughts she writes down. Also, that exercise class sounds intense! I bet you will look amazing by the end though!!!
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